Last Old Journal Entry

April 7, 2010 - 9 weeks

The verdict is in. We saw Dr. Haraway this morning. I was ill and impatient. When we finally got to the ultrasound, I was about to die. Part of me didn't even want to look. I was terrified. But then Dr. Haraway said the baby moved. And he and Nathan both said there was a heartbeat. I didn't see anything, so I was still a little skeptical. That's when I saw it. The fluttering of the heart. The baby measured exactly where it should be. So in November, we'll have a baby! Dr. Haraway said everything looked good. He even mentioned that sometimes when there is about to be a miscarriage, you can see blood behind the placenta. And he didn't even see that. So, maybe now I can quit fretting and accept this awesome birthday present.


Okay, so you know I haven't exactly quit fretting. I am still struggling some but I will say that throwing up every day or every other day does keep me more positive (odd, I know, but it makes sense to me). We still have over two weeks until the next appointment. I never really thought the second four weeks would be as long as the first four were, but this seems to be dragging. I can tell I am going to end up wishing this pregnancy away - not like I did with Jillian because I just HATED being pregnant - but because I seem to be very focused on getting to my appointment and making sure everything is okay.